Furious council workers strike over tea-break row

July 18, 2008

Workers at RCT council have just completed a two day strike and more wildcat strikes are promised if they don’t get their wishes of the working day being 10% official tea breaks rather than the 4% currently allowed.

Mr Ima Lazybastard who works at Pontypridd’s Market Street council offices said, ‘Bosses are being unfair. We’ve have had the same time allowed for tea breaks since the 1970’s. Our tea breaks should go with inflation and the 10% we are asking is not unfair.’

Council bosses pointed out, ‘It is actually 5% quicker to make tea than it was in the 1970’s because the modern kettle is a technological marvel and actually taking that into account the 4% we currently allow for official tea breaks is more than enough,’ Said Council Boss, Dafydd Dewdrop. ‘In fact,’ he added. ‘The lazy bastards take loads of unofficial breaks as it is.’

Strikers hit back saying, ‘Mugs are much bigger now so our tea breaks are dwindling. It takes at least 9% longer to drink a mug these days and biscuit chewing time all cuts into our scant allocated time.’

(PICTURED ABOVE – PONTY CHAVS DISCUSS FISCAL POLICIES AND GORDON’S BROWN’S NO WASTE SPEECH WHILE THEY WAIT FOR THE DSS TO OPEN)

Council workers enjoyed the strike with workmen being allowed to bring deck chairs, books and Ipods onto the picket lines. The one downside was the the weather was crap but the next strike is to be coordinated with the met office to ensure a pleasing day.’

Also in Pontypridd this week Rhydian will bring his Des O’conner tribute act to the park in order to please his many taste bereft fans. Expect an invasion of middle aged bimbos and woolie cardigans as the man who almost had the X factor brings the bimbos to the heights of sexual frenzy. Tom Jones might as well remove the carrot from his leather pants because the future belongs to Rhydian. The tickets have all been snapped up – mind you they were FREE.

BELOW: The Rhondda Rover has secured photographic proof that global warming is very real.

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